All I Want For Christmas is… SNOW and Vodka and a pert butt and a one stitch facelift and Vodka, did I say Vodka?!

5 Dec
Winter Swimming!

Winter Swimming!

Imagine waking up to blues skies every morning, never having to switch the heating on, never wearing winter boots, not even owning an umbrella…

Well that’s me, that’s my life on the always-sunny little island of Gran Canaria. 

The weather in the Canary Islands is pretty unique, this is one of the very few places in the world where the weather rarely drops below 20°C and doesn’t experience any scary weather conditions such as tropical storms or hurricanes, which often go alongside the hot weather of sub-tropical islands.

Lucky me eh?

But I want to leave.

I want to return to the piddley weather of Swansea – officially now recognised as Britain’s wettest city!

I want to see the green mountains of the Brecon Beacons, I want to cwtch up on the sofa wearing a onsie and a thermal vest, I want an open fire and to drink hot chocolate on a cool October morning, I want to see rainfall so heavy that is cleans my damn windows and makes everything smell fresh and bright and alive.

I want to see slugs again.

I long to feel the cold, to get dressed in the morning and leave the house before my make-up slides off my bloody face coz I’m in a bath of sweat!

And I really, really want a pair of red wellies!

But the thing I long for the most is snow, oh my how I miss it.

The last time I saw snow was on a ski holiday pre-kids in 2001, it was, without doubt, my favourite holiday ever and I cherish those fab memories each winter in Gran Canaria as I lie on the beach roasting my boobies off.

So at least I’ve got those memories eh!

But my kids don’t.

They’ve never seen snow, felt it or shoved handfuls of it into their mouths and felt it melt on their tongues. They’ve never seen a snowman, had a snowball fight or gone sledging, never felt that red-nosed coldness that has you running inside scattering snow everywhere as you kick off your sodden wellies and frozen gloves.

IMG_6319

If there was one gift I could give to my children this Christmas it would be snow, they ask for it every year, it’s number one on their Christmas lists, closely followed by Lego and Barbie.

So I am crossing my flip-flop clad toes that I will be chosen to be a Mark Warner ski blogger and then I could give them snow. Piles of gorgeous, crisp, freezing cold snow and I promise you, on my bikini-clad bottom that I’ll never complain about living in the sun again!

So until I return to my rainy, cold Swansea or as the poet Dylan Thomas called it “That ugly, lovely city”, I’ll keep wishing for snow in Gran Canaria!

Now tell me, what are you wishing for this Christmas?

9 Responses to “All I Want For Christmas is… SNOW and Vodka and a pert butt and a one stitch facelift and Vodka, did I say Vodka?!”

  1. Anna December 12, 2013 at 1:26 pm #

    Sarah, I fully understand every single one of your words- always sun doesn’t make you happy either:-)
    Now when are you popping in with that bottle of wine???xx

    • losingmylemons December 17, 2013 at 2:27 pm #

      Yes, you’d understand wouldn’t you sweetie, you’ve experienced life here too!

      I am sooooooo on my way! If only x

  2. Debbie Benton December 12, 2013 at 12:34 pm #

    I’ll have what the 1st lady above want’s, the Million (£’s though) then I may be able to afford heating!!

    • losingmylemons December 17, 2013 at 2:28 pm #

      Oh crikey, heating is something I certainly don’t have to worry about!
      Sending you some warm Canarian hugs xxxxx

  3. Have a laugh on me December 8, 2013 at 11:20 am #

    All I want for Christmas is no stress, fighting or screeching! Okay I lie, I also want a voucher for a facial or massage or something! Oh and I want a million dollars.
    A white Christmas, MEH, overrated! ;) xx

    • losingmylemons December 12, 2013 at 11:48 am #

      Ems, I’ve changed my mind. You are a damn genius!

      “Santa, I’ll have what she’s having!”

      x

  4. elinstreet December 5, 2013 at 10:16 pm #

    All I want for Christmas is a record player and some Quality Street.. But you don’t know what fun is until you’ve been walking in the snow, feeling the crunch under your wellies! At the moment it’s just constant wind and rain though:(

    • losingmylemons December 5, 2013 at 10:27 pm #

      Mmmm Quality Street! Christmas ain’t Christmas without them hunny! x

      I’m sure you’ll get snow again this year & I’ll be dying of jealousy AGAIN! lol xxx

      • elinstreet December 5, 2013 at 10:28 pm #

        No, snow earlier this year was bad news!
        Try being stuck in the house with your 17 year old brother for 48 hours with no links to the outside world!

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